Total pages in book: 25
Estimated words: 23271 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 116(@200wpm)___ 93(@250wpm)___ 78(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 23271 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 116(@200wpm)___ 93(@250wpm)___ 78(@300wpm)
I take a deep breath.
“Well, first, we wouldn’t attend as a couple. We would attend separately, with no expectation of only having sex with each other. And I think that’s the crux of the issue. You see, I don’t think that we’re actually ‘in love’ with one another or anything like that. I think that we’re both sex-positive folks who’ve come to an arrangement that works for us, namely that we both enjoy anal, and that it helps with my pregnancy too. It’s intimate, I’ll give you that, but I think we’re in a weird situation where the forced intimacy has blinded you. You think you’re in love because of the intimacy of our interactions, but I don’t think it’s really going to translate when put to the test, Mark. I think when faced with a bevy of gorgeous women, that you’ll want to partake, and even more, that I’ll support you,” I finish simply. The speech was harder than I anticipated and my chest is tight with anxiety, but I force myself to smile because this is a good choice for me and my lover. I don’t want a deep bond to form, or at least, I don’t want our bond to deepen anymore, and having sex with other people is one way to stop that process in its tracks.
But Mark is completely shocked, his mouth hanging open.
“You must be shitting me,” he says in a low voice. “You’re crazier than I thought.”
“No, I’m not,” I say quickly. “And I just got a text for the next Circle party, which is only two nights from now. We can check it out, and I think you’ll see what I mean. When you’re faced with the prospect of uninhibited, no-strings-attached sex with beautiful women, you’ll want to partake. And you’ll have my full approval.”
Again, it’s difficult to get these words out of my mouth because I admit, I’m a selfish bitch. I’d love to have Mark only to myself, but the thing is that I don’t want to pay a price down the road. Because what if my instincts are right? What if once the child is born, he wants nothing to do with us? Then, my heart would break for real.
You’re being too negative, Freya, the voice in my head whispers. You’re not giving him the benefit of the doubt.
But the thing is that I’m in a precarious position right now, and I can’t take any chances. I would rather end this now, than risk a horrible break-up when my baby’s six months old. As a result, I force myself to smile brightly.
“So what do you think?” I ask in a chipper voice. “Are you in?”
I expect my man to lash out at me, to call me names, and then to storm out, but instead, Mark surprises me. Those blue eyes shutter in a way that feels strange and cold, and then he nods.
“Let’s do it,” he says in a bland tone. “Looking forward. I’ve always wanted to go to a Circle party.”
I nod back and smile, but suddenly, my heart’s filled with fear because it’s one thing to allow your man to have sex with other women in theory, but it’s another to actually see it play out in real time. Oh shit. Suddenly, the lump in my throat is massive and I feel shaky and unsure. But it’s too late to back out now, and I only have myself to blame.
9
Mark
* * *
We stand on a small boat as it putters its way along the Delaware coastline. It’s evening, and the sky’s already a deep, purplish haze with pinpricks of stars glinting high above. The wind’s slightly chilly, but Freya seems okay. My woman’s swathed in a thick brown cloak which gives no clue to her lack of clothing underneath.
After all, we’re headed to one of the Circle’s secret parties, and this one’s more elaborate than the others. Rather than renting a mansion or setting up a dungeon basement, the Circle’s gone all out this time. The society actually rented out a castle on a private island, and as a result, all attendees need to be ferried to the location by boat. How do I know all this? Because I’m actually a member of the Circle’s High Table, so I’m intimately familiar with the group.
It happened when I was working as a firefighter in Sansome. Back then, I frequented sex clubs to my heart’s content, and it was no big deal. I got so used to them, that they even lost their appeal. But then I went to a Circle party and it blew my mind. The setting was exquisite, the locales unbeatable, and even more, the women were utterly gorgeous. They were luscious and wanton, just the way I like them, and I started going to events every chance I could.