Total pages in book: 46
Estimated words: 43402 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 217(@200wpm)___ 174(@250wpm)___ 145(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 43402 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 217(@200wpm)___ 174(@250wpm)___ 145(@300wpm)
Livy was standing behind a folding table stacked with cookies in plastic wrap. Her honeyed hair pulled back in a ponytail, nervous hands smoothing the tablecloth. She was skittish as a deer, and the second she spotted me, I could see wariness in her gaze.
It hurt more than I’d admit.
I cracked a joke about Hangman’s ugly mug, and she smiled. That smile made me breathe easy for the first time in two years—the amount of time I’d spent away from her. I bought three dozen cookies just to keep her talking. “Cowboy cookies,” she’d called them—oats, coconut, chocolate, pecans. I took one bite and swear to God, I fell in love with the cookie, but knew my feelings from those faraway days in that community center had never disappeared.
When Cara—Hangman’s sister—asked her if she’d taken a break to eat and Olivia admitted she hadn’t, I asked her to grab lunch with me across the street. She hesitated but smiled—one that filled me with warmth—and agreed.
We sat in a booth at the Subway, of all damn places, and talked like we’d known each other for years. It was easy. Her voice calmed something inside me that hadn’t been still since Mavis tore my heart out. I asked to see her again and she didn’t even think. She just agreed.
For the next month, we met there five days a week. I didn’t tell anyone. Not the club, not my brother in New York, not even Hangman. Those lunches were my peace—an hour in the middle of chaos where I could breathe. Olivia listened. She laughed. We became so close that I hated being away from her. It wasn’t sexual. It wasn’t about need. It was about grace.
At least at first.
Being with Olivia was the first time I’d felt clean in years. She helped me decide to get the club clean. No more running guns, no more smuggling. We’d rebuild the club into something worth being proud of. I felt re-energized and luckily, most of the brothers agreed. Only Ranger grumbled, whispering to anyone who’d listen that I’d gone soft.
It was Olivia who gave me the idea for Saints Concrete Company. She encouraged me to build something real, something that gave back to the community. Her contacts in the city opened doors for us, and before long we were laying foundations in five towns, bidding on contracts, proving everyone wrong.
She did that for us—and no one but me truly knew. Well, I think Hangman suspected. He saw me having lunch with her once in a while, but he never said a thing. The truth is the club owes her everything.
And then, everything went bad.
I hadn’t planned on kissing her. It just happened one night after work. The air was thick with everything we weren’t saying. One moment we were talking, and the next, my mouth was on hers—soft, desperate, hungry. To my surprise, Olivia didn’t pull away. She kissed me back and my heart beat out of my chest. My phone began ringing and I wanted to ignore it, but Olivia pulled away and smiled at me. I can still remember her soft voice.
“Answer it, Bear. I’m not going anywhere.”
Those words filled my heart completely.
I saw the caller ID and it was Ranger. He’d been giving me shit and I didn’t want to take the chance that he’d hear her voice and told Olivia to wait—kissing her forehead while promising I’d be right back.
When I returned to our table inside the Subway, my whole world crashed. Ayita was there smiling, waving, and running into my arms. “I thought you were working in Townsend!” she said, bright and trusting. Livy stood frozen, silent. Disappointment filled her gaze and there was so much pain. Pain I caused. I hadn’t told her about Ayita.
The scene replays in my mind. Years haven’t diminished it at all. I lied and told Ayita that I finished the job early and stopped to take a leak. I saw the crushing disappointment in Olivia’s face, and I fucking hated myself. I started to take the words back—tell Ayita I was in love with Olivia, confess everything. Before I could, the future I wanted slipped through my fucking fingers. Ayita’s words ended everything.
“Baby, I have a surprise for you. I just got back from the mall, and I visited your favorite store.” She turned to look at Olivia—oblivious to the pain in those beautiful eyes. “He loves when I go to Victoria’s Secret,” Ayita laughed. “Bear this is my friend Olivia. Livy, this is the guy you encouraged me to take a chance on.”
“She did?” I ask shocked.
“I didn’t give her any details, not even your name. I just asked her if she thought I could trust a man with my heart who had a questionable past. You know I had reservations, sweetheart. Olivia encouraged me to take the leap. She said she was in love with someone who was making the same type of changes and had never been happier.”