Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 75626 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75626 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
TWENTY-TWO
ALEX
I’ve never been a man down on his luck until now, and I could easily blame Maggie, but when it comes down to it, it’s on me. There’s a long list of things I should’ve done differently. Not only with Maggie, but definitely with Kelsey. She’s my priority and I should have put her feelings first, especially after the fiasco with the photos from the gala. I didn’t do that.
When Maggie told me she was returning to Portland I should’ve made it clear that I’d moved on. I didn’t and now I’m in this pickle.
In more ways than one.
Watching Kelsey leave out my bedroom slider and run across my yard put me at my lowest. Worse than the bullshit with the photos. I’m thankful I don’t have a game this week otherwise I’d be a waste of space on the field. This shit should’ve never happened, and I should have never allowed Maggie in my house without checking with Kelsey first. She is the only one who matters.
Except for the baby Maggie’s carrying.
My world spins on a tilted axis right now. I don’t know how to stop it or change it. Everything seems to be out of my control, and I don’t get how I messed up so badly. It’s not as if I cheated on Kelsey, but I guess I wasn’t exactly upfront with her, either. Yet, here I am, dressed in a suit to go to a doctor’s appointment for a baby that may or may not be mine.
Talk about another low blow.
There isn’t a doubt in my mind, my question about paternity hurt Maggie’s feelings but seeing her there at my front door hit me hard. Why not tell me? Why keep it? Believe me, this isn’t a good surprise. It’s a hurtful one. Not only to me, but to Kelsey as well, and she doesn’t deserve to be hurt.
Outside, after the appointment that I didn’t need or want to be at, Maggie acts like we’re together. She brushes lint off my jacket—the one I don’t want to wear—and kisses me, despite me making my feelings toward her very clear.
“Stop.” I dodge her hand from touching my face.
“Why?”
“Because you know why,” I tell her as my phone chimes. “We’re not together.”
“We could be. What if the baby’s yours?”
What if?
I don’t have an answer for her. The noble thing is to be with her, but I don’t love her. I’m in love with Kelsey, and in the few days Maggie’s been back, I’ve realized Maggie’s not the one for me. I don’t like who I am when I’m with her.
“Alex, we didn’t even need to break up when I moved.”
“Yet, we did. Proving that nothing good comes from a hook-up because now you’re pregnant, and according to that chart you showed me, your conception date is either the day you left or the day after, which means as soon as you got to London you fucked someone. Where’s he at? Why isn’t he here going to your appointments?”
“Don’t be crass,” she says as she huffs and ignores my questions. Still, I want to know where the other guy is. And I can’t help but wonder if they were a couple when she came back to visit? When did they start dating?
I pull my phone out and my face lights up when I see Kelsey’s name but falls instantly when I see what she sent. I look around, sensing she’s near and quickly type back, asking where she is.
“Fuck.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Well, if I had to take an educated guess, Kelsey saw us together.”
Maggie looks around, as if it’s going to make a difference. “Well . . .” She shrugs and looks at her phone.
“What do you mean, well? I’m in love with her, Maggie, and you put me in this situation.”
“And what do you want me to do about that, Alex?”
“Gee, I don’t know. Not fuck someone within hours of leaving me. Or how about getting a damn DNA test so I’m not stuck in fucking limbo, wondering if I’m losing the best person to ever come into my life.”
“Do you seriously mean that?”
I give her my best pointed look. “Yes, I do.”
“Are you saying you regret our relationship?”
“No, I’m not,” I sigh. “But we ended, and I met the person I’m meant to be with, and now she wants nothing to do with me. Being in a relationship with an athlete is hard enough, but being in one with me, when you’re looming over her all the time is daunting. Shit shouldn’t be this hard.”
I start walking up the street, away from Maggie even though it pains me to leave her there in her condition. I need a moment away from her. My life cannot be about her, not anymore. I tug at the tie around my neck and stick it into my pocket and undo the top two buttons of my shirt. When I turn around, Maggie’s walking toward me, focusing on her phone.