Hissy Fit Read online Lani Lynn Vale (Southern Gentleman #1)

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Funny, Romance, Sports Tags Authors: Series: The Southern Gentleman Series by Lani Lynn Vale
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Total pages in book: 72
Estimated words: 70741 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 354(@200wpm)___ 283(@250wpm)___ 236(@300wpm)
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It was hours later, after consuming a few beers and playing over ten hands of Speed, that I finally admitted defeat.

“I suck!” I laughed, throwing myself backward onto the couch. “I have no clue how I got to be so bad!”

He chuckled. “Don’t feel too bad. I practice a lot with the kids. When Grady’s gone, they spend more time over here than in their own house.”

I smiled and shifted, my pants super uncomfortable.

I groaned and shifted again.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

Thunder boomed so loud that I jumped. “Shit. That scared the crap out of me.”

He stood up and stretched and the shirt that he had on lifted up high over his belt, revealing his sculpted abdomen.

He had a six-pack. Oh, dear. Sweet baby Jesus.

I wanted him so bad.

I squirmed in my seat, this time not from my jeans digging into my belly, but because my vagina had pulsed with need.

God, the man was sexy.

“What’s wrong?” he repeated.

Instead of telling him the reason I’d squirmed that time, I went with my original discomfort. “My pants are tight as hell, and they’re digging into my flab.”

He blinked. “You don’t have any flab.”

I snickered. “Oh, I have flab. Trust me on this.”

His eyes narrowed, and he dropped his arms back down by his sides. “I have a pair of sweats you can borrow… or I can offer you a pair of Cady’s. She decided that she was going to stop wearing normal pants after Moira was born, and I haven’t seen her in jeans or pants of any kind that weren’t stretchy since then.”

I found myself smiling. “That’s kind of funny…and I can handle the jeans. They’re just uncomfortable. I don’t see us being here too much…”

The tornado sirens started to go off, and Ezra’s eyebrows lifted.

I swallowed. “Should we go hide in your bathtub?”

He walked to the cube storage and opened a drawer, pulling out a pair of sweats and tossing them in my direction. “Let me go make sure that my sister heard that, and then I’ll be back…and yes, head to the bathroom.”

I kept hearing the weatherman in my head saying ‘Get to a small, windowless interior room.’

After Ezra disappeared, I started to unbutton my pants, shoving them down my legs moments later.

I’d just stepped one foot into the sweatpants hole when Ezra came back in.

“They’re not here. I for…” He halted suddenly halfway in the doorway. “Shit, I’m sorry.”

I squeaked in surprise, then fell over onto the couch while I kicked my legs into the pant legs.

Before I could get them both in, I fell to the ground between the coffee table and the couch, hitting hard.

Once I had them pulled up over my hips, I laid there for a few long seconds wishing that the ground would swallow me whole.

“You okay?”

I looked up to find him standing over me.

“I’m just gonna lay here and hope that the tornado only takes out this couple feet of area right here,” I gestured to where I was laying.

He snorted and offered me his hand. “If it makes you feel better, I only saw your ass.”

No, that didn’t make me feel better. Not in the least.

“Swear to God,” I told him honestly, hands still covering my eyes. “If you say another word, I might break down in embarrassed tears.”

He snorted and I heard him move, then suddenly I was up and moving.

I made an ‘umph’ sound when my belly hit his shoulder, and shortly after that, I gasped because Ezra was really tall, and I found myself staring down his back and at his ass.

His ass that was encased in a pair of jeans that molded delectably to his ass so perfectly that I wanted to write the makers of Levi Jeans a letter and tell them that they should get an award.

The way his shirt was riding up, I could see a small sliver of skin, and the dark gray outline of his underwear…and then it all went dark because he made it into the bathroom.

“Shit,” he said, handing me the flashlight that I only just now realized that he had. “Hold on. I’m gonna go back for the candle. I don’t want to run down the batteries on this flashlight.”

He turned around, and I found myself going back out into the living room. Moments later he had the candle in his hand as he squatted down, and I got to see the crack of his ass.

And what a nice crack it was!

Jesus, I was such a loser! It was bad when the crack of Ezra’s ass turned me on…

A sharp crack of thunder had me gasping, and I grasped what was closest to me…Ezra’s butt.

“Shit!” I cried out, my heart pounding away in my chest.

Then I realized what I’d done, and immediately let him go.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured. “I didn’t mean to touch your butt.”



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