Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 86322 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 345(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86322 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 345(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
The transformation was mesmerizing—I couldn’t tear my eyes away. I lingered on the fine lines that appeared around his eyes with each smile, memorized the crease in his cheek, the straight perfection of his teeth, the strong slope of his throat when he tipped his head back to laugh.
And the laugh…deep, sharp, a little rusty, and absolutely addicting.
Absolutely arousing.
I made a goal then and there to hear that laugh as much as possible over the next five years.
Don’t forget your other goal, whispered my cynical voice.
Right.
My goal was to keep my company.
But also, to hear that laugh.
I could have both without losing the other.
“I should probably excuse myself,” Felix said, pulling my attention away from ogling Lucian. “Please feel free to stay for a nightcap and chat.”
“I’ll help you upstairs,” Lucian offered, standing.
“No need. We moved my bedroom to the guest suite on the first floor.”
Lucian froze, his brows pulling tight. “Why?”
Felix cleared his throat and studied the table as he slowly stood before meeting Lucian’s gaze. “The stairs are a lot for a man of my age. It’s easier to remain on one level.”
All signs of happiness vanished from Lucian’s face, leaving behind the muscle jumping with every clench of his jaw. “Maybe if you tried any of the treatments, you would be able to enjoy your own room,” he bit out.
“Lucian…” Felix sighed.
“Or maybe you should reconsider treatment to ensure you’re able to attend my wedding that you bargained for.”
“Lucian,” Grace gasped. Her eyes darted with concern between him and me at the mention of the bargain.
We played our roles well. She thought our smiles, seeking each other’s gaze, and soft touches were genuine. She assumed I agreed to marry Lucian without knowing about the bargain he made with his godfather. She assumed we were in love.
So, I smiled, soft and steady, attempting to portray that I understood every facet of the situation—that I understood Lucian’s anger. And I did. Watching someone you love die brought out the worst in you. Watching my mother waste away from lupus complications twisted me into sharp edges until I hardly recognized myself.
In that moment, I understood him better than ever before. I understood the fury, the sadness, the fear braided so tight he couldn’t separate one from the other. I understood his motivation for asking me to marry him.
Until now, I’d only focused on myself. Our agreement had always been one-sided in my mind. I hadn’t cared about his reasons, only my own, and doing whatever it took to achieve them. But seeing him like this made it all suddenly real, stirring a tangle of emotions I hadn’t expected. Empathy for his situation. Determination to help him keep his promise to Felix. Guilt, because his family wasn’t just an abstract obligation anymore—they were real. I liked them and didn’t want to hurt them if the truth ever came out.
Beneath it all, fear coiled low in my stomach. Because if I liked them this much now, what would happen in five years when I had to walk away?
“I need you there,” Lucian implored Felix.
His soft declaration wrapped around my heart, urging me to comfort him. I slid my hand over his clenched fists, and his shoulders sagged—the fight fading away.
“D-do you have a date set?” Grace asked with a watery voice.
“Umm…” I looked to Lucian with wide eyes.
“Not yet, but soon. We don’t want to wait long.”
My heart tripped, stumbling over the word.
Soon. Soon. Soon, soon, soon.
It started to sound like the theme song for Jaws. Speeding up. Closing in.
How soon was soon?
The question brought with it the realization that Lucian and I needed to have conversations that didn’t just include the kind of sex we planned to have.
“Good. Good,” Felix said with a nod. He inhaled, the breath thin and reedy, and smiled, as if we all hadn’t heard the rattle in the silence. “Aspen, it was wonderful to meet you finally. I hope you’re able to drag our elusive godson to more dinners, and we can get to know each other better.”
I returned his smile. “I would love that.”
Felix pushed his chair back, and Lucian pulled his hand from mine, rushing around the table to his side. “I’ll still help you to bed.”
“Fine, fine,” Felix ceded.
“We’ll be in the sitting room when you’re done,” Grace said.
Once they left, I followed Grace to another beautiful room with high ceilings and thick crown molding that appeared original to the historic home.
“So, do you have ideas for the type of wedding you’d like to have?” Grace asked as we sat.
I smiled despite the question piercing my heart. “Kind of. I used to talk to my mom about it all the time when I was younger.”
“Aww, that sounds amazing.”
“It was.”
“Well, I’m sure you two have it all planned out, but if you need help with anything, I’d love to be a part in any way you’ll allow me.”