Total pages in book: 57
Estimated words: 55039 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 275(@200wpm)___ 220(@250wpm)___ 183(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 55039 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 275(@200wpm)___ 220(@250wpm)___ 183(@300wpm)
“She’ll hate me,” I tell him.
“She may not.” Sully shrugs.
“They have standards, and what I did would be disgusting to her, I know it.” I scrub my hand down my face and shake my head.
“He hasn’t told her yet, and I’m sure Josh told him.”
Josh, that fucking asshole.
“Speaking of Josh, you know your mother is back, right?”
I had heard, seen her briefly at the funeral those months ago. But because I haven’t been back, I hadn’t cared to find her. Why would I? She was never a mother to me.
“If Anderson hasn’t said anything to her yet, why would he wait?”
“I don’t know, but you should tell her.”
“It’s in the past. It’s where it will be staying,” I say, ending the conversation with him regarding that.
“Where do you plan to go?” he asks as I walk to the front door.
“I don’t know. I’ve never left this city, so I guess wherever I end up.”
“August.” I turn back to him. “Are you sure you’re doing the right thing?”
I look back to my bike.
Am I sure? I don’t know. But I am.
“I’m like a leech in her life. If I don’t leave, I will continue to suck all the light out of her.”
“You’re wrong. I see the way she watches you. She loves you.”
“I have no doubt, and love makes people blind. They can never see clearly through their feelings,” I tell him. “I have a wicked heart, and hers is anything but.” Stepping out, I go to my bike and get on it. Sully stands at his door, watching me as I pull away. I drive past my house and see her car is no longer there. Glancing at the time, I know she would be on her way to work. She is never late. It’s one of the things I like about her.
Driving to her work and parking off the street so she can’t see me, I watch as she gets out of her car, locks it, then checks her reflection in the window.
There is no need. Nothing is out of place.
Everything is as it should be.
She straightens her shoulders as if she needs the boost. Maybe she does. I did leave her asleep, but she had to have known that was bound to happen.
I’ve told her before it could never work between us. Not once did words leave my mouth last night to give her any sort of false hope.
It’s not something I am willing to give her, even if the lies sat on my tongue. They wanted to slither out and whisper sweet sorrows to her, tell her all her fantasies. So I bit it, hard, until it knew not to say a word.
It was the only way.
How do you make yourself stop loving someone?
It’s next to impossible.
Her friend walks up behind her as she finishes checking her reflection and taps her on the shoulder. She smiles at her, and even through my helmet, I can tell it's forced.
Her friend bumps shoulders with her, and this time, she gives her a full smile—one I have missed so much—as they start walking to the building.
Getting back on my bike, I drive to Rylee’s place. Noah’s car is still there. When I get off the bike, he comes out to meet me, Rhianna standing back at the door, hard eyes assessing me.
“Sorry I wasn’t in the office today. I’ve had things on.” I nod. “She isn’t here,” he says.
“I know.”
He nods and hands me the paperwork he’s holding. I take it, thanking him.
“You’re going for good?” Noah asks.
“Yep.”
Rhianna comes over and slides her hand into Noah’s.
“You can’t keep on coming back. It hurts her a little more each time.” I nod at Rhianna’s words. “I want you to know you were good for her. You made her see her worth. So, thank you.”
I’ve never really had anyone thank me for making another person feel before. Especially someone as precious as Rylee.
“I don’t know if this interests you, but…” She looks up at Noah, then back to me. “Your mother lives down the road with a few other people if you wanted to say goodbye to her. We hear she’s working now at one of the grocery stores and is doing well.”
I take in her words and walk away. My mother is trying to be good. This, I must see. Driving to the closest store, I see her sitting out front, a cigarette between her fingers. She looks up and knows it’s me. Her eyes go wide in surprise as she stands and walks over. I don’t bother getting off my bike. Just lift the visor so I can see her better.
“You came to see me?” she asks, her brows raised high.
“I came to say goodbye,” I tell her.
Mom’s head drops, and a soft whoosh of air leaves her. “Will you come back?” she asks, hopefully.