Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 97426 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 390(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97426 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 390(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
She’s right in the center of most of the pictures. I stop at one picture and run my finger over Ant’s face. He looks so handsome even as he’s brooding.
My cousin and my man are more important to me than anything. I know what I’m going to do before I get to the last picture that seals the deal for me. Pit and Ant are smiling together.
Anthony has real joy on his face. All his life, all he has ever wanted was to be a part of his brother’s life. Let him tell it, and Will was once his best friend.
I don’t know what all happened, but to see them smiling together now, I can’t go back and see that all ruined.
“You can cancel that room. I won’t be staying after all.”
Chapter 10
Loss
Alexis
Three and a half years later...
My heart hurts. I gasp and drop to my knees with the phone still to my ear. I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Wrapping my free arm around my waist, I rock back and forth as I allow Kid’s words to sink in.
“I’m so sorry, honey. I hate that I had to call you with this.”
“This doesn’t make sense. My father wouldn’t do this. Are you sure?”
“The news confirmed it. I’m so sorry.”
My mind bucks against her words. My father wasn’t the type to commit suicide. He had his issues, but I can’t believe he’d do this. He was always about his own survival.
Why would someone who put his own nieces in danger to save his own ass turn around and kill himself? Unless… I never believed he did it to begin with. Yeah, Daddy did some shit and ran in some rough circles, but that, now this.
I can’t wrap my head around it. This just doesn’t seem real. The worst part is, I don’t know if his crimes have died with him.
My first thought is to go back and see to a proper burial. However, I don’t want to risk another warning.
My heart sinks. With my father gone, I’ve lost all hope that I’ll ever be able to return. Kid had just started to report that something had changed with him. I was so hopeful.
I thought I could finally count on him. I was just working up the nerve to ask for his help to get out of this.
“I didn’t get to say goodbye. I never got to explain. What have I done?”
“I knew you would go there and blame yourself. This isn’t your fault. Your dad has always had a lot going on.”
“I need to bury him. I have to come back.”
She’s silent on the other end for a while. I sniffle and wipe my nose on my sleeve. My heart stops because I know she’s about to drop another bomb on me.
“What? What haven’t you told me?”
“There isn’t a body. He jumped off the Bridge Lake Bridge.”
“What?”
“I… I don’t know how to tell you all of this.” She blows out a breath. “His car was found on the bridge. His suicide note was in the driver’s seat.”
“Oh my God.”
“They’ve been combing that river, but still no body yet. I say you shouldn’t risk the trip if there’s no body to lay to rest.”
“I guess you’re right.”
“I’m so sorry, honey.”
“Me too,” I sob.
Chapter 11
New York
Anthony
Four and a half years later…
I was supposed to meet up with this chick I’ve been talking to online, but as soon as the planed landed, I changed my mind. Instead, I thought I’d take a walk and get a burger or something somewhere.
I thought about asking Pit to come along, but he’s been in a shitty mood since we boarded the plane in Vander. I have my own attitude tonight. New York… this race would be in the one city I loathe. This is where I was supposed to move to with my wife.
I’ve hated this place like it owes me something for years. I’ve always wondered if she’s here. Is she happy? If she is, I’d love to shit all over that.
How fucked up can you be to know how fucked up I was and walk out on me? She never loved me. If she did, she’d still be with me. Every time I hear the name Smith, I snarl.
It’s crossed my mind a time or two to go to her father, maybe ask him where she is. Then he committed suicide. She didn’t even show up around the time I heard about it. Heartless bitch.
Still, I’ve even thought to ask Pit if he could find Ven and Shawn so I could ask them about her. Bridge Lake is small, but I’ve never met any Black dudes named Ven or Shawn, something I’ve always found strange. Ven would be closer to my age. I think Shawn is a few years younger than Alexis.
However, I’ve come to wonder if anything she told me was true. As far as I know, it was all lies. One after another, after another.