Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 83800 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83800 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
I feel like the man has always been honest with me. He was man enough to pump the brakes and make us slow things down so he wasn't just another man who carved a notch in my headboard. He took his time with me, making sure we had more than a physical connection before we took things further. He handled me with care, and I know punishing him for one mistake when I could possibly have a lifetime of happiness would be the wrong choice on my part. I would want forgiveness and understanding if the roles were reversed.
Me: I'm still mad.
Robert: Let me make it up to you. I'll pick you up after work and we can go someplace where we can be completely alone.
I chew the inside of my cheek because that sounds incredibly nice. I can't stomach the idea of going back to their villa and facing all the men who interrogated me anytime soon. Although I know if Robert and I work through this mess, it'll have to happen eventually.
Me: I'll see you after work.
Robert: See you soon, Morgan.
The second half of the day drags by much like the first did only for a very different reason.
Hours later, when I step out into the parking garage, I watch as Robert waves Heathen off before walking toward me. He looks as sad as I feel as he approaches, and instead of saying something, he simply pulls me to his chest and doesn't say a word as I cry silently in his arms.
When the sobs subside, he steps back, hands cupping my face.
"I'm so sorry," he whispers before pressing a soft kiss to my forehead. "Let's go somewhere we can be alone and ignore the entire world."
"I'd like that," I whisper.
Chapter 32
Rooster
I have regretted a lot of things in life, more than I can count, when Henry is involved, but nothing has hit me the way Morgan's words did this morning as she was leaving the house.
I've sat with that pain and remorse all day until the point that my body is completely drained. Yet, somehow, I find myself continuing my torture by jogging on the treadmill. I'm not even moving fast enough to break a sweat, but I still can't make myself stop. It's as if I need to cause physical pain in addition to emotional pain in order to equal the shit I pulled yesterday.
As I sat in silence most of the day while the world continued to rotate and everyone went on with life, I came to the realization that Morgan's history, all of the things that I found out about her while researching, proves that she isn't the type of person to get so tangled up with Henry that she'd willingly hurt someone else.
Henry's history is more about convincing people to betray others, so even if she was a reluctant participant, it wasn't because he had threatened someone she cared for.
All of that together tells me that I had to have missed something in regard to those text messages, whatever it was that proved she wasn't a player in this game. She was Henry's pawn.
I gave up on her so quickly that if it were possible, I'd kick my own ass.
I have no idea how to fix it or how to make things better. If asking for her to forgive me would work, I'd crawl across broken glass to kneel at her feet and beg her to give me one more try.
Honestly, she deserves a man better than me. She deserves a man who wouldn't give up so easily in the face of adversity.
Knowing she deserves more doesn't mean I'm going to walk away and give up on the idea that we can work through all of this and somehow manage to come out on the other side not only together but better and stronger than we would've been if it never happened.
I know what I've lost, and not just the potential of what could've been. She filled a void inside me that I didn't know existed until parts of her were already there. There's no damn way I can walk away and just chalk it up to something that once could've been.
There's no getting over Morgan Spence, and I'd never forgive myself if I didn't do everything in my power to get her back.
I hit the stop button on the treadmill with determination. I have to make this right. I have to at least try by being vulnerable and laying it all out for her to decide if I'm worth her forgiveness and the risk of going forward.
My legs are wobbly as I step off the machine, dizziness making my eyes swim for the briefest of moments, and although I know I need to eat and get some sleep, there's nothing more important than trying to get my girl back.