Total pages in book: 125
Estimated words: 117443 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 470(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 117443 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 470(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
Chris finished mowing, showered, and headed back over to Hayley’s place for lunch. Thank God she was lying about the tofu chili and telling the truth about the pulled pork sandwiches. They were delicious. He ate two and would have gone for a third but he wanted to save room for the cake that finally, finally!, finished cooling on the rack. He hung out against the counter watching her whip up a quick batch of chocolate buttercream frosting and finish it off. He tried to swipe some icing with his finger but she whacked him with a wooden spoon and ordered him to gather some plates and forks.
Setting everything on the deck, Chris cut himself a giant slice of the gorgeous confection, picked up his fork, and took a huge bite. But either he’d had a mini stroke while mowing or something had gone terribly wrong in the oven because it was terrible. Just God awful. He struggled to swallow and chased it down with water. “Slick, what the hell? It’s disgusting. It’s horrifying. It’s…fake cake.”
She smiled at him, while cutting a small bite of her own slice. “It’s healthier. No sugar, no gluten.”
He wrinkled his nose. “No fun!” he declared. “It is a No Fun Cake. I didn’t even know you could bake a cake with zero fun in it. Cake is cake. Cake is total fun. It’s birthday parties, and graduations, and weddings. Fun stuff! You can’t have a cake with no fun in it! It’s un-American!” He shook his head. “I can’t believe you defiled a sacred thing like cake just to jerk me around. You’re evil, Hayley Turner. Just plain evil.”
Chapter 12
Thursday night was Poker Night, and, as promised, Hayley appeared at the back door, arms full. She unpacked everything on Chris’ counter. The boys wandered into the small kitchen and watched her slice a glistening chocolate confection with a large knife.
Chris reached out and grabbed Tex’s arm. “Don’t eat it! The cake is a lie!”
Tex cocked his head at Chris and then eyed the cake. “Looks okay.”
“It’s not,” Chris insisted. “It’s a no sugar, no gluten, no fun cake.”
Tex looked at Slick who smiled sweetly at him. “I would never do that to you,” she told Tex.
Tex nodded and shoved a forkful into his mouth. He groaned. “Ohhhh. Mmmm. Yeah okay. I see what’s going on here. You have a head injury or something,” he told Chris with his mouth full. “Because this is the damn cake in the world!” To Hayley he asked, “Why is this cake so good?”
“Sour cream and dark chocolate,” she replied.
“What?” Chris shouted. “I didn’t get Sour Cream! Or chocolate! I got fake cake!”
“Well, she doesn’t like you,” Hawk pointed out, munching on his own uber-sized slice. “But she likes us.”
“Apparently,” said Doc, licking buttercream frosting off his fingers.
Chris threw up his hands. “I can’t believe this! Why do they get real cake?”
“You know why,” Hayley told him matter of factly.
Chris gaped at Hayley then tried to grab Tex’s plate. “Give me some!”
Tex smacked his arm and moved away. “No! You had a failure to communicate. Now you don’t get cake!”
“I order you to give me that cake!”
“I defy those orders,” Tex said, shoving a large hunk into his mouth. “This is so worth the stockade,” he declared.
“This is my house! That is my cake!” Chris yelled. He turned on Hayley. “You gave my cake away, woman!”
“Surely you’ll have a birthday at some point,” Hayley replied cooly. “Maybe I’ll make you a cake then.”
Hawk laughed. “His birthday is like two months away.”
“You people suck!” Chris shouted and stormed outside. He flopped down onto one of the deck chairs. He heard the screen door open, but he didn’t turn.
“Chris,” Hayley said quietly.
“Go away. I’m angry.”
“Chris,” she admonished.
“Seriously. Go back inside.”
Hayley put a hand on his shoulder, leaned down and set a plate in front of him. He blinked at it. It was a whole little mini-cake. His heart leapt for joy, but he kept his voice cool. “Is it real?”
“Very,” Hayley assured him. “And it’s all for you.”
Chris took the fork she handed him and shaved off a piece. He brought it to his lips and experienced cake nirvana. “You’re very dangerous,” he informed her, taking a bigger bite. “Very devious. If you had enough money and a small army, you could take over the whole country. And no one would care because you’re so damn cute.”
“Of course they wouldn’t mind. I’d let them eat cake,” Hayley replied, grinning.
Chris finished off his mini-cake and headed back inside. The boys settled at the table and Doc started dealing the cards. Hayley gathered the cake plates and started washing them. “I can do that tomorrow,” Chris called out to her.
“It’s fine,” she assured him, filling the sink with water.
Chris would have grumbled, but his belly was full of delicious sour cream, dark chocolate cake and he was still riding the sugar high.