Total pages in book: 151
Estimated words: 140874 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 704(@200wpm)___ 563(@250wpm)___ 470(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 140874 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 704(@200wpm)___ 563(@250wpm)___ 470(@300wpm)
Tears had welled up in my eyes, and I thumbed them away. “Wow. So…this is what it’s like to have someone believe in you, huh?”
“It’s a good feeling, isn’t it?” He put his arms around me. “I will always believe in you, Sophie. As arrogant as it may sound to admit this of someone that you love and plan to marry, you and my younger self have a lot in common.”
I hugged him, feeling foolish for being so vulnerable. But if I couldn’t be vulnerable with Neil, I’d have to maintain a twenty-four-seven front, and I loved him too much to not let him see the real me, warts and all. “We do? Even this whole ‘lost year’ thing of mine?”
“Darling, I had a baby with a woman I had absolutely no future with when I’d just gotten out of college. It should have been the biggest mistake of my life, and it wasn’t. But believe me, it was sheer panic at the time.”
Oh f—“What’s Valerie going to think?”
Neil’s features slid into a frown of confusion. “About what?”
“About the magazine. About me going in to business with Deja? Who got fired from your company for just talking to Gabriella?” I rolled my eyes. “And she still thinks I was trying to destroy Porteras from the inside out. Not to mention the fact that my publication is sort of similar to Porteras and—”
“Oh, fuck Valerie,” Neil said with an annoyed shake of his head. “I’m sorry. Sophie, you must have realized by now that Valerie’s problem with you has nothing to do with what happened at Porteras. It’s an easy way to justify her dislike for you because you’re with me.”
I wasn’t sure my jaw would actually close after that. He’d admitted that his relationship with her put a strain on our relationship, and he’d done the work to make it up to me by listening to my concerns and setting boundaries. But he’d never said a word against her. Which I admired, but it was somewhat gratifying to hear that the sun no longer shone out of her totally innocent ass.
“I’m not stupid,” he continued, his tone softening. “I haven’t been…fair to you. I’ve pretended that the only interest Valerie had in me was platonic. But I realized a long time ago that Valerie will always be either waiting for me, or wanting me to wait for her. I don’t even believe that she’s in love with me, I think she just can’t bear the thought that I might be happier than she is. But I respect her, and she’s my business partner and the mother of my child. That doesn’t mean she has any say in what you do with your life. You’re marrying me, not my past.”
“Fair enough.” What else could I say to something like that? “So, the magazine is on.”
“It appears so.” He paused. “Just don’t sell that bag. Please. I’ll buy it from you. It’s too lovely.”
“Okay, maybe I’ll keep it.” I picked it up and tapped my fingers on the leather.
He hugged me and kissed the top of my head. “And if by chance you’d ever want to sell your company—”
“It’s not for sale,” I said with a contented sigh. I stepped back. “I need to go do something. Finish your chapter.”
I went to my office in the loft over the den. I woke up my MacBook Air and got to work. First, I emailed India. I apologized for having altered her career path, but writing another book wasn’t in the cards for me at the moment. I’m Just The Girlfriend was one of the most scary, painful things I’d ever done. I wasn’t one of those people born with ink their veins, and it seemed stupid to force myself to continue. I let her know all of that as gently as possible, and added:
PS. If you’re ever looking to return to the fashion world, I’m starting my own magazine. You’ll always have a place there, you just have to let me know when you want it.
After I hit send on that bit of awkward business, I composed a message to Valerie. This one was a little trickier. I typed, proof-read, edited, re-edited, wondered if I could reasonably get away with a few mild jabs, then decided that honesty was going to be the best policy, not just when it came to Neil, but when it came to other people, too.
Valerie:
I know you don’t like me. I don’t like you, either. But I appreciate the way you tolerate me for Neil’s sake. It shows how good of a friend you are, even if you and he don’t always see eye to eye.
Though I don’t forgive your repeated attempts to harm the relationship between Neil and me, I should have never said the things I said to you at Emma’s rehearsal dinner. It wasn’t the mature way to handle the situation, and my assertion that I would somehow be justified in demanding Neil cut you from his life was petty and hypocritical. And for that I’m sorry.