Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 116759 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 584(@200wpm)___ 467(@250wpm)___ 389(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 116759 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 584(@200wpm)___ 467(@250wpm)___ 389(@300wpm)
An ache spread across my chest at the romantic words. Everything drowned out around me as I stared at Beth and Callan.
I’m quite happy to let the world know you’re mine.
It was the reminder I needed, even if it was slightly painful. Perhaps there was a tiny part of me holding out hope for Sebastian to become more. But it had been almost two months of close friendship. If something was going to happen, it would have already. And I shouldn’t hang around for someone who didn’t want to shout from the rooftops that I was his and he was mine.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
LILY
Guilt got to me about the ad sponsorship money and not pulling my weight. Even though Beth’s words had helped, when January gently needled me again as we were leaving the Carmichaels’ that Sunday, I agreed to go with her to record the next episode.
It was late, I was tired, and I didn’t want to, but I took a cab to the university with Jan.
Sierra and Aiysha were there and were surprised to see me, which made me feel worse.
Aiysha stood to hug me, her soft, dark tight curls tickling my nose. As always, January’s best friend and fellow fashion student looked like she was ready for the runway. Her bright yellow cropped sweater was amazing against her umber skin. “I’m so glad you’re here. We have a couple of call-ins tonight that I think you’re better suited to deal with.”
“Than whom?” Jan teased as she took her seat at the recording table.
“I love you, babe, but you have all the subtlety of a cartoon anvil,” Aiysha replied drolly.
Chuckling, because, wow, it was true, I took my seat next to Sierra. “How goes it?”
“Busy as hell.” Sierra ran a hand through her hair. “I want this year to be over, but I don’t, you know.”
I did know. I reached to squeeze her arm because I was going to miss her so much when she left after our final semester.
“Nope. No sad crap before we even get started,” Jan admonished with a wag of her finger. “I just spent the day in a kitchen with two smoking-hot famous footballers and got nowhere. So, I need a pick-me-up, not a bring-me-down.”
“Explain yourself,” a wide-eyed Aiysha demanded.
I wrinkled my nose. “Callan is Beth’s boyfriend. Where did you think you’d get with him?”
“Oh, pfft. You know I meant Baird. I noticed he drooled on you. I guess younger women aren’t his thing.” She pouted and shrugged nonchalantly. “Och, I can wait.”
“What is she talking about?” Sierra leaned into me.
“Something that’s never going to happen,” I murmured back.
“I heard that!”
I turned to my sister. “Baird is a player, Jan. You’re not going there.”
“Who is Baird?”
“Ladies, we’re ready and I have places to be,” Kenny, our producer, huffed into our headphones.
With that, we started the episode. A few call-ins got the ball rolling and discussion flew between us.
“So, we’re talking Sierra’s … what… tenth date since the start of the semester?” Aiysha said into her microphone. “Lily, she’s making you look like an old spinster. No offense.”
“I think it’s more than ten, actually.” Sierra grinned at me. “Come on, Lil. Tell us all why you’re going through such a long dry spell. Does it have a name?”
At the wicked glint in her eye, I stared back stonily. I did not want to talk about Sebastian on our podcast. “I’m just busy.”
“I think it has a name,” Jan agreed.
This time, my quelling look made the smile drop from my sister’s face.
“Okay, well, it can’t only be that you’re busy,” she recovered.
Deciding now was a good time to bring up the discussion of peer pressure, I asked, “Why is it young women are under pressure from society to actively pursue romance? If we’re not actively trying to date, it’s worse than if we are and are failing.” I looked at my cohosts. “Can’t I just take a break from the exhausting process of dating? I have a lot going on with school and I’m tired. Sorry, that’s not a funny or charming answer … but I’m tired, guys. I’m tired of looking for Mr. Right and I need a break. I’m not giving up. I just need a break. And I think we should normalize women making the decision to focus on themselves instead of pursuing a romantic connection.”
My cohosts were silent for a few seconds.
Then January slow clapped. “Well fucking said, big sister. I bow to your feminist wisdom.”
My lips curled at the corner. “For those of you who don’t know my wee sister well, that is not her sarcastic tone, though you might think differently.”
“No, I’m sincere. I can accept being put in my place when it’s done as well as that. We should all shut the hell up and let you be you. Note that, listeners. If the people in your life are pressuring you into anything, they should all shut the hell up and let you be you.”