Regretting You Read online J.L. Beck, Cassandra Hallman (Blackthorn Elite #4)

Categories Genre: Angst, Dark, Erotic, New Adult, Romance Tags Authors: , Series: Blackthorn Elite Series by J.L. Beck
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Total pages in book: 70
Estimated words: 65552 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 328(@200wpm)___ 262(@250wpm)___ 219(@300wpm)
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Talon shrugs. “I mean, I’d fuck you, but you aren’t the type I’d keep around.”

Crystal and all her friends gasp in shock, and I decide to make my exit. I don’t want to be a part of this squabble any longer. I’m not anything to Jackson, and I don’t want him to feel obligated to stick up for me anymore.

Grabbing my tray, I get up from my seat and walk to the trash. Dumping the half-eaten salad into the garbage, I do my best not to run out of the cafeteria. I make it through the double doors and down a set of steps before I hear someone running behind me. Glancing over my shoulder, I find Jackson running toward me.

“What the hell, Kennedy?” he growls as he reaches me, his breathing harsh.

“I…” What do I even say?

“You didn’t have to leave because of her. She would’ve left all on her own.”

I tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear and look up at him. “You didn’t have to stick up for me, and I wasn’t going to stay there and watch a fight ensue that I had no right being a part of. Those are your friends. Plus, I was done eating, anyway.”

Jackson’s brows furrow, and his nostrils flare. “You still had a whole salad, and you didn’t even open your water.”

I shrug, knowing I’ve been caught in a lie. “I lost my appetite. Anyway, I’m fine. Go back inside.”

“Why?”

Confusion bleeds into my face. “Why not? They’re your friends.”

“Talon is my friend. Crystal is no one.”

A heartbeat passes, and then another, and I’m not sure what to say. Do I tell him about what Crystal said about this morning? Come out and ask him if he’s sleeping with both of us? Or is that too straight forward? He told her he wasn’t interested, but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t interested before.

“Did she say something to you?” he interrupts my thoughts with his question. I suppose it’s now or never.

Licking my lips, I say, “Not directly. It was more telling the entire cafeteria.”

“What did she say?” Jackson crosses his arms over his chest, making himself look more imposing.

I drop my gaze to the floor and stare at my sneakers. “She said that you called her this morning to come over, and that you hung out together last night. I don’t really care who you hang out with, but like I told you before, I don’t want to catch any diseases or anything, and I don’t know who else you’re doing stuff with and…” I’m rambling now.

“Shut up,” Jackson says sternly, and I feel my heart sink into my stomach. Things were going so well. Why did I have to go and screw them up?

Goosebumps break out across my skin when Jackson’s fingers grip onto my chin, forcing me to look up and into his forest green eyes, in the sun, they seem a shade lighter than usual.

“If I wanted to fuck someone else, I would. The only person I’m doing anything with is you, and I literally can’t stand Crystal. I don’t want her, and we aren’t friends.”

I nod or at least try with his grasp holding my head in place. My shoulders suddenly feel lighter, and warmth fills me, knowing he isn’t with anyone else but me.

“Oh, okay. You didn’t… you didn’t have to tell me. We aren’t anything. You said it yourself, we’re not even friends.”

A ghost of a smile tugs at Jackson’s lips. “We’re complicated, to say the least, and I didn’t have to say something. But I’m dicking you, so you deserve to know if I’m doing the same to other girls, which I’m not.”

“Dicking?” I can’t help but giggle at the term. “Is that even a word?”

“It is now,” he says, grinning. “Seriously, though, I wouldn’t do that to you.”

I shouldn’t even ask, shouldn’t even contemplate saying the word, but my mouth gets the word out before I can stop it. “Why?”

He shrugs. “I wouldn’t allow you to sleep with someone else. So, it’s only fair I extend the same courtesy to you.”

And in a roundabout way, I feel like he respects me more. That he’s seeing me for more than what I did and who I took from him.

We both lost Jillian that day, and though we didn’t die, whatever we shared did. I want that back more than anything in the world because when I’m with Jackson, everything seems a little brighter, a little easier.

23

Jackson

A week passes, and things with Kennedy remain the same. I hate admitting how much better I feel when we’re together. It still seems like I’m betraying Jillian by befriending Kennedy, and it takes an enormous amount of effort to remind myself daily that that’s not the case.

My mind is assaulted by images of Kennedy from the night that we shared dinner together. Her smile, the way she opened up to me. It’s not new, we’d always been friends, so I don’t know why it’s so different, but it feels like we’re just becoming friends for the first time.



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